Tuesday, February 10, 2009
My first GriefShare class was last night. I practiced introducing myself all the way there in the car. With confidence I approached the room, said Hi to Jan, and sat down. As the introductions began I was holding strong. And, wouldn't you know it, I totally lost it when it was my turn! Why does that always happen? Carlos can talk about Philip to complete strangers and he doesn't tear up...me, I just think about him and there go the water works. I mean, I practiced for goodness sake, I prepared! It has been a hard two years always feeling like no one could hurt as much as I am hurting. It was, in a way, enlightening to hear about other people's grief. The loved ones they missed and the everyday things that brought up the hurt. Their relationships are different, but their pain the same. It was a hard class but I am excited to go again next week. We even got a workbook with homework in it. That really works for me for a couple of reasons. I totally love homework (yes, I am a dork and I miss school). I know the homework is going to bring on lots of tears, snot and the "ugly crying face" so I feel better about doing that at home without strangers to face.